Add to the list of banned games: Juice Volcano.
It's too bad their mama is so narrow-minded.
Friday, July 29, 2011
Thursday, July 28, 2011
getting old sucks
Ryan had a moment last night in which he realized that most people on TV are younger than he is. Not a capital-M moment, just an uncomfortable realization.
The capital-M moment came when he found a gray hair somewhere other than on top of his head.
The capital-M moment came when he found a gray hair somewhere other than on top of his head.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
funk it up
Few things say 'funky' like a jar of radish pickles left too long in the back of the fridge.
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
still other things we learn in kindergarten, but later forget
Going down a three-story carnival slide in a sundress gives you three stories' worth of slideburn on your ass.
Saturday, June 25, 2011
the world according to Owen
"Look out, Mom! I'm about to transform into a four-year-old boy with no pants!"
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
In Which I Discuss My Undergarments
Today I am wearing a billionaire's socks.
Actually, according to Forbes he's not quite a billionaire (a mere 800-plus-millionaire), which is a touchy subject, but nevertheless he's so wealthy that he apparently feels it would be beneath him to wear the same pair of socks twice. This is, by the way, my husband's former employer we're talking about, which is how I came to be in possession of some of his discarded socks, because I have what could be described as RCD, Recycling Compulsive Disorder, and they are Perfectly Good Socks.
Actually, according to Forbes he's not quite a billionaire (a mere 800-plus-millionaire), which is a touchy subject, but nevertheless he's so wealthy that he apparently feels it would be beneath him to wear the same pair of socks twice. This is, by the way, my husband's former employer we're talking about, which is how I came to be in possession of some of his discarded socks, because I have what could be described as RCD, Recycling Compulsive Disorder, and they are Perfectly Good Socks.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
other things we learn in kindergarten
"Mom, what does fuckit mean?"
"Who says 'fuck it'?"
"Landon. What does it mean? Is that the f-word?"
"Alec, that's a very very bad word and you must not ever say it. And I don't think you should be friends with Landon."
"But what does it mean??"
"It's so bad, I don't even know what it means. But you don't ever say it. If you say that word, everyone will think you're mean and bad, and you will have to go see Mr. Forsberg."
"If it's a bad word, could I say it to bad guys?"
"Maybe so. But only the worst bad guys ever. Only if there were alien bad guys from outer space with laser eyeballs who wanted to eat you. Then you could say fuck it."
"Okay. Thanks, Mom!"
"Who says 'fuck it'?"
"Landon. What does it mean? Is that the f-word?"
"Alec, that's a very very bad word and you must not ever say it. And I don't think you should be friends with Landon."
"But what does it mean??"
"It's so bad, I don't even know what it means. But you don't ever say it. If you say that word, everyone will think you're mean and bad, and you will have to go see Mr. Forsberg."
"If it's a bad word, could I say it to bad guys?"
"Maybe so. But only the worst bad guys ever. Only if there were alien bad guys from outer space with laser eyeballs who wanted to eat you. Then you could say fuck it."
"Okay. Thanks, Mom!"
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)